How to keep your sanity intact during Covid

 

Mental Health Matters

As we are fighting the second wave of the deadly corona virus pandemic, mental health has become an issue all over. How to maintain our sanity is a big question

Those who are safe at home should feel blessed that at least we are sleeping in our homes and not in a hospital. Spend quality time with your family in between work. Play some indoor games such as carom, ludo, chess and play antakshri. Let kids know about these games too. If you have an independent house or have some space on the terrace, you can play outdoor games too. This is the best thing Covid has given us, family time.

Many are constantly working for office from home and doing household chores at the same time. Most of us are working without helpers or maids. All family members should come forward to help each other in managing the chores, so that the woman of the house is not burdened with all the work. The lady of the house should also get some free time in between office and house work. And if the woman is a homemaker, she should not be taken for granted that all household work is her duty. Instead tell her that you always are on your toes, so now start sharing your load with us and see the million dollar smile on her face.

Make a garden of your own in your balcony or terrace. You just have to collect seeds from the kitchen and plant them. There are ample details on the internet on how to grow them. And once the first sapling starts growing, you will experience what is called real joy.

If you have never entered the kitchen, try that. It’s said that cooking is a great stress buster. To say, “I can cook” is much cooler than saying, “Sorry I can’t cook”. Or you can start from baking. Baking a cake is literally a cake walk. And the first cake that you will bake will be the most memorable one and the tastiest too.

Try to connect with old friends; nowadays social media has made it very easy. Try to find all childhood friends and call them, talk with them about all your childhood mischiefs and get nostalgic. Video-call them, see how they look now and pull each other’s legs. Friends are life’s best gift to us. 

Music is another magic that you can explore. Listen to all types of music, sing along and dance even if you have two left feet.

If you had a hidden wish to learn some musical instrument, but could never fulfil it, this is the time to do that. There are lot of weekend classes available online. In the next get-together, you can proudly show off your new skill.

If you have a knack of writing but never got time to do that, then start now. Start with writing your feelings in a diary; gradually you can even start your own blog.

Ladies, if you like the way celebrities look you can learn how to do make-up on internet and when things will be back to normal, you can surprise your friends, colleagues, neighbours by getting ready like a pro. 

Who knows one day your newly explored hobby can turn into your profession. And when your hobby becomes your profession, life becomes beautiful.

 

Be positive. Don’t forget to follow me on my blog --MixedBag-- for more such write-ups. You can also subscribe to my YouTube channel -- Think Positive Make a Difference in Life, or follow me on Facebook -- Think Positive Make a Difference in Life. You can write to me in the comment section.  

 

I am not mad, why would I visit a counsellor?

Why is mental health important?

People in India still openly don’t say that they visit a counsellor. They don’t understand that if it’s important to visit a doctor when someone has a physical problem, it is the same with the mind. Mental health is equally important. 

I had a nature of counselling people when they felt low and loved to bring a smile on people’s faces. Naturally, I had the knack of reading articles on parenting and other counselling topics. While working for a newspaper, I decided to do a course on counselling. I used to attend classes on weekends and later interned in a hospital set-up in my 30s with very young girls.

When my family and friends came to know about it, they would confide in me with their problems as they felt comfortable talking to me. They would compliment me often after I counselled them. So one day, I decided to give an ad in a local newspaper and started counselling people on weekends as on other days, I had the journalism job.

I started getting calls. But often, the queries were strange, “What type of counselling do you do?”  “From where have you done the course?” “What procedure you follow?” “What is counselling?” “What does a counsellor actually do?” “Can you counsel me on phone?”

Once a lady even requested me that she would send me the fees but I should counsel her on the phone. Though I tried to convince her that face-to-face counselling is always better but she insisted. So I agreed to counsel her over the phone. But she didn’t turn up nor did she call. That’s the problem. Sometimes people make up their mind to talk to a counsellor and then they take a step back.

One of my relatives from a different city often used to call me as she felt better talking to me, sometimes for hours. I advised that she should visit a local counsellor as I knew she was lonely and had some past issues. She replied, “I am not mad, why I would visit a counsellor?”

I still smile remembering a man who addressed me doctor while fixing the appointment and throughout the session though I kept on telling him that “I am a counsellor”.

One day, a young girl came to me. She felt so good talking to me that after reaching downstairs, her father (who came to pick her up) called me to say that she wanted to talk more. I advised them to come after seven days as talking again the same day wouldn’t have helped much. They never returned. 

Once a housewife came to me for counselling, and after her session I advised her to bring her husband in her next session. Sometimes family counselling is important to better heal the person. But she said, “No, that’s not possible.” Instead she asked me if I could teach her to speak English. I said yes so that at least she should turn up for the next session, at least to learn English. But she never came. I even called her as I really wanted to bring her confidence back. But she never responded.  

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwTZirredJupZZs65UfnmJg/videos

Child counselling is difficult as they don’t open up so easily. I remember once a mother coming to me with her son, who was around 12 years old. The mother requested that she would be present during the session. Though I wanted to talk to the child alone, sometimes mothers won’t understand, and they feel insecure too to leave the child alone. The moment the child started confiding in me, the mother started interfering in between and gave her own advice. One of the questions I asked the child was, “Do you somehow feel your mom loves your younger sister a little more than you?” The child just moved his head in affirmation. His mother immediately asked, “Don’t I love you?” The child became quiet again. That session was of not much help because of the mother. I requested her to bring the child after seven days and said I would talk to the child alone for some time. But they never turned up.

Some came with genuine problems. And returned for multiple sessions, and felt better too. In some cases, when I felt that only counselling won’t help, I would refer them to psychiatrists as they would need medicines to heal.

The problem was that one fine day they felt, ‘okay let’s visit a counsellor and meet her for a day and everything would be fine’. It was difficult to make them understand that day one was only history-taking and introductory session. Most of them didn’t turn up for the next session.

In an hour-long session, they would continue talking even after the time limit. Then I started putting an alarm to make them aware that the day’s session was over. But that would rarely help. Often my one hour’s session would extend to one-and-half hours.

Fee was another issue. I started with Rs 300 for an hour-long session (that was long time back). One day, an old lady came with her son who was addicted to some medicine and was drowsy throughout the session. That lady requested me to take Rs 200 and I obliged. I advised her that her son would need hospitalisation to heal completely. I suggested a few names where she can call and admit her son. But she never called me to inform about the developments of her son.

A young boy came to me for counselling and forgot to bring his wallet. And he remembered that after the session was over. I never asked for my fee before the sessions. That day, I felt like laughing at myself. One of my friends knew his mother and so she transferred my fee online. I still don’t ask for fee before the session, lesson not learnt.

What did I learn as a counsellor? I became a good listener, I became empathetic, I don’t judge people and I became more forgiving. 

People in India still openly don’t say that they visit a counsellor. They don’t understand that if it’s important to visit a doctor when someone has a physical problem, it is the same with the mind. Mental health is equally important.

Mental health and physical health are connected. Mental health plays an important role in maintaining good physical health. Often, mental issues such as depression and anxiety, affect people's capacity to maintain health-promoting behaviours.

When mental illness is left untreated, it can cause major emotional, behavioural and physical health issues. Sometimes they lead to unhappiness and decreased enjoyment of life and even family conflicts.

Now with the pandemic taking the world in its grip, mental health is a big concern with people mostly indoors. With everything going digital, even counselling sessions are being taken online. The need is only for people to understand that if they feel something is bothering their minds all the time, they should not shy away from talking to a counsellor.

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How Covid changed the life of an ‘Aam Aadmi’

 https://bestmediainfo.com/2021/05/how-covid-changed-the-life-of-an-aam-admi/

Published in BestMediaInfo

How Covid changed the life of an ‘Aam Aadmi’

After a tough 2020 and hoping for a better 2021, we are all back to square one – the ravaging coronavirus in a stronger and deadlier avatar, the same old lockdowns, work for and from home, fear, uncertainty and again hoping that this too shall pass

Life has taken a 360-degree turn ever since Covid struck us. Now, everything revolves around the virus — yet again. Till Covid entered our lives, our mantra was to be positive always. But now ‘positive’ is the most dreaded word.

The moment we open our eyes in the morning, the first thing we do is check our society WhatsApp group to see if there is any new case. Ever since the cases have been surging recklessly all over, a sense of fear has dawned — at least in our campus — and people do not go out unnecessarily — the only bright thing in an otherwise gloomy atmosphere.

Until Holi, the atmosphere was like — where is Covid? And people celebrated the festival of colours as if there is no tomorrow. And now the virus is doing tandav all over — and in multiple and stronger strains. Some people partied too early and celebrated victory over Covid, and just because of those foolish few, we all are suffering, locked inside our homes once again.

Just two weeks before Holi, we went home 2,000 kms away from Delhi. Things were much better then. There was a semblance of normalcy. We just needed to be patient. Had people waited another year to celebrate their favourite festival, maybe things wouldn’t have turned so bad.

We just can’t blame Holi. Just look at the gatherings at election rallies; as if Covid had bid adieu. But we are not allowed to speak or write on that. In a digital India, election campaigning could have been easily done virtually as the internet has reached Bharat (rural India) too. Or even better had the local and state elections been postponed by at least a year.Some leaders even claimed that cases in their states were going down, making a fool of themselves and even the aam janata, who otherwise seem to know everything.

Religious gatherings made things worse. Don’t understand why we Indians become blind when it comes to religion. If we believe God is everywhere, why can’t we pray inside our four walls till things get back to normal?

Another topic of discussion has come into our lives: whether to take the vaccine jab or not, and if yes, which one to take — Covishield or Covaxin or wait for Sputnik? And ever since the government has announced that every adult is eligible to take the vaccine, the enthusiasm has only increased. As if we will all get our boondh of amrit. But folks, don’t forget you will still have to follow Covid-appropriate behaviour even after taking the vaccine. Else, even if you might be shielded a bit, you will be the carrier and infect people around who are yet to get be vaccinated.

A new trend that is emerging on social media is a selfie after taking the jab with the hasthag #vaccinated. Nice to see that people are taking it seriously. But in a hugely populated country like ours, it will take time and patience to vaccinate one and all. We tried twice but the crowd was scary. There have been instances of people getting infected at the vaccine centre itself, and we didn’t want to be among them. And seeing very old people standing in long queues, we felt that we can wait as they need it more than us.

Now that a lockdown is being imposed phase-wise all over India again, an atmosphere of panic is gradually sinking in. There are queues in grocery shops to buy essentials and stock up, lest we die of hunger. If there is less space in the kitchen, then our living room has become a mini-grocery shop with all sorts of food items stocked. The unwritten rule is leave the things as it is for the first 12 hours, then sanitise each and everything in case the virus dares to stay even after so many hours in May’s scorching heat.

Our hunger pangs have also increased in the lockdown, and we tend to have too many meals throughout the day — breakfast, brunch, lunch, early evening snack, mid-evening snack, dinner, midnight snack and more the better.

Having helpers at home was a normal thing during pre-Covid days but now we have to manage everything on our own, including brushing our cooking skills like last year. Good for us, at least some exercise after all the overeating we do throughout the day. But don’t forget to help the helpers who are dependent on us. We can all become mini-chefs and try our hands in our retirement days if the virus lets us live.

Fake forwards are doing the rounds all over social media yet again. Every second person starts giving advice on how to boost immunity, what to do and what not to do. And we the obedient people are tempted to follow them too often. Ayurveda is ruling again as home remedies to boost immunity are flying thick and fast — garlic, lemon, amla (Indian gooseberry), turmeric, ginger, chyawanprash and what not. At least in our home, we take them all as a regular ritual depending on availability.

Mask is another debatable point. Initially it was advised that only medical professionals need to wear masks. Then it became essential for all to wear masks. And now it’s safe only if we wear a double mask. The best part is we don’t have to apply make-up as the mask comes to our rescue. For some it has also become a fashion statement but don’t forget the safety factor.

Now it seems no family will be left untouched by Covid. Recently, my brother-in-law tested positive in Guwahati. A doctor friend of ours arranged a bed in a hospital. As we could not go, my mother-in-law called 108 for ambulance but it was not available, so she tried for private ones and they demanded Rs 5,000 to drop him to hospital and Rs 5,000 for PPE kit. This is just a single instance; there is black marketing all over in the whole health structure till the cremation ground.  Guess in these uncertain times, some people are forgetting there is a law of karma. Karma is smiling, saying “As you sow, so shall you reap”. 

But everything is not that bad as there are lot of good Samaritans all over serving people selflessly.

Fortunately my brother-in-law had mild symptoms and he remained in home isolation. By God’s grace, he is fit and fine now. Yes God’s grace is the only silver lining in the cloud in these uncertain times.

Even if it’s a conspiracy as many articles doing rounds say, till there is a supreme power above us, we should not lose hope and just keep our fingers crossed and pray that things will be back to normal like before — and not the new normal we are going through.

 

How Covid changed the life of an ‘Aam Aadmi’